wigglewhiz: (Default)
wigglewhiz ([personal profile] wigglewhiz) wrote2010-08-02 07:47 pm

Workin' 9 to 5 - or... would like to, anyway. Hello?

So.

Jobhunting.

It SUCKS ASS.

It's the whole rigmarole I just find so disheartening: scouring newspapers, magazines, websites, looking for anything you could convince someone that you could do (and that you really COULD do without wanting to put your eyes out with your own thumbs within the first few days).

Tweaking your CV so that you look your best for that particular vacancy (you're not using a default CV for EVERY application, are you?! LOSER!).

Tailoring a cover letter to sound competent, enthusiastic, and to say SOMETHING about you other than can be found on your CV or other than "Your job looks OK. I really need a job, so.... yeah. Hi." (You're not using a default cover letter as well, are you?!)

Then waiting. Oh god, the WAITING. I've taken to working on my job applications right up until the very last moment of the closing day, and then emailing them where possible. Because that way there's SLIGHTLY less waiting. While you're waiting, your mind ticks over all the things you COULD have and SHOULD have said in your CV and cover letter (fuck). You try to work out what a reasonable time is to process and shortlist interview candidates and convince yourself that clearly your application was binned at the off (fuck). And yet, you hold out this teeny little hard kernel of hope in your flinty, vulnerable heart until you finally (after some time) get a rejection letter (FUCK) - if you're lucky and they haven't just decided to flip all the rejected candidates a sneaky silent bird (DAMN YOU ALL).

Or you get an interview! Yay! And you spend time ensuring you have the right outfit, that you research the company and take some notes about the company/industry/area and come up with some insightful commentary about such, while going back over your CV and cover letter and making sure you have an example of everything you've claimed. You go over possible "curve ball" questions and formulate answers. You shower and groom and fret about whether you should wear your glasses (intelligent?) or not, and in my case whether you should take your nose-stud out (I never do. Because if you're going to be wearing it every day at work, you may as well be upfront about it).

You go the interview and it... goes. Sometimes it goes badly or uncomfortably enough that you're fairly sure that you're out of the running immediately. But more often, it seems to go fine! There's a bit of banter! There's some impressed-looking nodding! You're comfortable, and they seem comfortable! You answer questions! You get a bit of your research in to the conversation and you feel... perhaps not confident, but that you performed reasonably well. And then you get the rejection letter or call.

<sigh>

Aaaaand back to the scouring of the web/paper...

So where did you go wrong?! Well, if you've been round the interview circuit a little reasonably recently, chances are you haven't done anything wrong. You're correctly attired, you're trained on the type of questions that are likely to be asked and you answered well. It's just that someone answered better. Or has more experience. You can NEVER control for the candidate pool you're up against, and you'll never really know WHY you missed out on the job - which means you may be doomed to repeat this shitty cycle for a while (GAH).

Now, many job sites will tell you that you can ask for feedback on your interview performance in order to help you bag the next job. I hate this. I worked in a car dealership once many moons ago, and a woman who was unsuccessful in her application for a sales job phoned for about a fortnight badgering our Sales Manager to tell her EXACTLY WHY she didn't get the job, culminating eventually in her accusation that "It's because I'm FEMALE, isn't it?!?". I'll never forget you, Crazy Lady - you make me more resolute to just absorb failure and try again on my own steam, rather than looking so goddamned insanely desperate.

On the other hand, though, I really do wish I knew what was getting me booted out of the running:
 

  • Is it because I'm a strange Scottish foreign person in New Zealand? Communication problems, culture clash, unsure of education/work background compatability?
  • Is it because I'm trying to change career? That "c" word is used fairly laughably, I don't have a "career" as such. But I want to move into a slightly different line of work, so... yeah, that might throw some people.
  • Is it because I'm currently a little rotund? Fat people like myself find it harder to get jobs thanks to some underlying stereotypes. And in jobs, we earn less than our slimmer counterparts. Look up the research if you don't believe me. I would, but I'm too FAT AND LAZY.
  • Am I doing something I'm totally unaware of? Blinking in a weird psychopathic fashion? Talking too fast in my weird foreign accent? Coming across as an arrogant asshat?
  • Or is it simply because there was a better candidate in the pool who just pipped me to the post?
Are any of these more tolerable than the others? Because I can assure you, the rejection hurts all the same, whatever the reason.

To all those in my boat, looking for work in a volatile recessionary environment (and I'm so aware that many are in tougher environment than here in li'l ol' Noo Zillund) - I raise my fist in solidarity. Hang in there, bro.

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