wigglewhiz: (Default)
I decided to give myself a weekend off from the 'quake coverage, because it was becoming all-consuming and I think was contributing in large part to my weird emotional state last week. It didn't really work, because I've dipped in and out of the news all weekend - but at least I didn't sit there glued to it, and I think I've given myself a much-needed bit of emotional space.

I built a barbecue that we bought on sale on Monday. We don't have a gas bottle for it yet, so it's sitting in the garage all newly-made, pristinely clean and virginal, waiting for that first sausage/burger/delicious butter-slavered foil-wrapped corn cob. All the while we was building it, Himself and I were congratulating ourselves on the fact that we now finally have an Emergency Cooking System in the event of a natural disaster. Way to keep It our of your mind, there, Wiggle!

Himself and I started painting the guest bedroom, in preparation for [livejournal.com profile] suzycat 's inaugural visit. It'll also be used later by Whizmum and Roo towards Christmastime, and I've been slowly buying in nice things to make it a lovely room to stay in. Like the rest of the house, the room has the "coloured feature wall" scheme of decorating, which to be honest I'm not a fan of. However, I'll stick with it - but I'm not sticking with the horrible mid-to-deep blue in the guest room, and instead have opted for a soothing soft green. Bringing the painting forward did two things - made me feel like I was doing something for [livejournal.com profile] suzycat , in a weird and mostly impotent and irrelevant kind of way, and gave me a great deal of kind of zen type peaceful enjoyment. I always loved painting and decorating my spaces, and it's been two years since I was able to. I'll probably get in trouble with the Letting Agent for changing the property without permission, but I REALLY don't care at this point.

I gave myself Saturday and Sunday morning off from talking about work. Or thinking about work. That didn't really work either, because I did talk about it and think about it a bit. I mostly spent Saturday Skyping with Whizmum and chatting online with a good friend, and naturally the work thing came up. *sigh* I've decided that I need to let go of being concerned that my team might be edgy and nervous about having a new manager, and not take responsibility for that. I need to just be myself, go through my normal decision-making process and stand my ground. Some of my decisions may be wrong and/or unpopular, but that's mine to bear. The only way they can get rid of me is to put a complaint in to my boss, and as long as I stick my usual decision-making and thinking processes, they won't have a leg to stand on if they do that.

I also bought more booze and chocolate, and have consumed some more quantities of both. WHAT?!
wigglewhiz: (Default)

...not that she asked me to or anything, sorry about the presumptiveness [livejournal.com profile] suzycat ! I can't see Facebook at work, so she may well have updated herself and y'all already know this, but -

Got a text message from her this morning - she's safe and sound down in Timaru with her parents and family, so sounds like everyone's good.

With that little bit of news I feel like I'm able to breathe almost all the way out now - just one friend to hear back from.

Updatery

Feb. 22nd, 2011 09:26 pm
wigglewhiz: (Default)
I heard (in a ridiculously circuitous route via other rellies in Oz) about the Christchurch rellies. All are OK.

Both of their family houses are destroyed, and they've been evacuated to Civil Defence shelters. But no-one is hurt, and that's the main thing.

I'm watching the news at the moment and it's terrifying and sad - and I feel so selfish for just being glad that everyone we know (thus far, although we've still to hear from two friends) is OK, when there are families out there in that lovely, friendly city whose loved ones won't be coming home.

DEAR GOD,

Feb. 22nd, 2011 06:24 pm
wigglewhiz: (Default)
Here's the deal: I know I don't believe in you. YOU know I don't believe in you. Or you would know, if you existed. But if you DO exist, perhaps you could make sure my family in Christchurch are OK. Because I can't get a hold of any of them, and I figure you have a bit of an edge on me given that you have that whole omnipotence thing going on.

While you're doing that, if you could just look after the people of Christchurch I would really appreciate it, although you didn't prevent your own beautiful Cathedral from caving in, WITH PEOPLE IN IT, you bastard.

Yours,

Atheist, But Here's Your Chance To Do Something About That.


fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck



The news has just confirmed the death toll as 17. Seventeen. I know that doesn't sound like a big number but... oh dear god that poor city.

I got a hold of two friends, including  the indominable [livejournal.com profile] suzycat . She's OK, but last I heard from her she wasn't able to get a hold o her parents. My other friends are also OK, but they can't contact one of their sons. I haven't heard from two another friends and I can't get a hold of my Christchurch relatives. They at least don't live in the CBD, so I'm hopeful that they're fine and that I just can't get them because the phone lines are down (they're... oldies and they don't do that mobile phone thing).

I don't know what to do. I have friends and rellies there, I'm in the same country, but I can't do a damn thing. The blood donor service put out a call at the hospital this afternoon for donations, but they won't tak mine (UK person potentially exposed to Mad Cow Disease, don't'cha know). The hospital is on alert and this afternoon saw all the crisis/emergency/contingency planning people swing into gear in the office next to mine. Me and the team couldn't do anything but try to look after the staff who had CHC rellies and were desperately trying to make contact with them.

I feel useless. Utterly, utterly useless - to be so close but so far away, and so utterly powerless to do anything other than hope.

DAMMIT.


 





FUCKING HELL. FUCKING HELL FUCKING HELL FUCKING HELL, death toll revised.

TO SIXTY FIVE.

Sixty. Fucking. Five. Oh my god.


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